Makes you weird at parties - embroidery

bush tales: can a condom disappear?

Names have been changed – for obvious reasons
 

Daisy: When I was out and I was drunk off my nut…

Me: yeah

… we ended up having s-e-x and I felt like really ashamed of myself-

oh why!?

Because man..

why, is he weird?

I mean… I wish I could show you a picture of him

does he have three heads?  I’ve had that moment don’t worry. There’s someone that I… well.. yeah.. it’s ok.. We all have that person

But it was really really really really bad

what, the s-e-x ?

oh yeah, terrible

*laughter*

but also I was drunk, he was drunk… and then the next day I had a tummy ache (and I was also very ashamed of myself)

*laughter*

So anyway; so the next day I had a tummy ache for the whole day (and I was just living in shame) and then I went to the toilet in the evening to do a wee (for the record it was a wee) and then… erm… I got up after sorting myself out and it just Flopped-On-The-Floor!

*a lot of laughter*

it was really loud and I was like s***! and I just ran into the kitchen and was like f***********k oh my god this means there’s been a condom inside of me for like 12 hours!!

god, ah it actually makes me feel so eurghhh

I know can you imagine! I was really disturbed by it though.

…and do you know what; I still slept with him again.

*both hysterically laughing*

Image cc insta @whitemarket

don’t beat around the bush

 

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